Complete write off.

anziety

Sometimes I have weird days where I wake up and I can’t breathe. Today was one of those days. I woke up to get ready to go to college, and as I sat up I realised I was struggling to breathe, I felt really dizzy and I was shivering but sweaty. I sat from 6am until about 10am just trying not to fall over, at one point I even went into my bathroom (because it was cool) and sat on the toilet and placed my head against the wall in the hope it would make me less dizzy. I didn’t wake up Daniel because I assumed this would be like any other day and it would pass in an hour or so, then I would get a later train into college and carry on my day as normal. This didn’t work out in the slightest. I then tried going and sitting in bed with a hot water bottle and one of my Zelda manga’s, I managed to re-read the first page at least 11 times. For anyone who has read a manga you will know they only have about 5 words per page, so from this you can judge how zoned out I was. I then spent the entire day either in bed or on the sofa being super dizzy and a bit of a mess. I have to get up for work in the morning and it is the last thing I want to do, I am so worried that I am going to get really dizzy again and make a fool of myself at work.

I am still not sure if my issues today were caused by my anxiety or by the seizures I have had previously, which I am going to a seizure clinic about in the next 2 weeks. The feelings I experienced today were very similar to how I feel right before I have a seizure or pass out, if they continue over the next few days I will wait until I have a day off work then maybe go get checked out at hospital again – as I was told to attend every time I feel this way as they are investigating heart and brain issues caused. Really today was a complete write off, I also got news of a family friend passing away which would have thrown me off on a normal day, I can’t wait to move on and try to get back to a bit of normality. Here goes nothing. Onwards and upwards. Lets hope that my dizziness and shortness of breath today was nothing.

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